HD Homilies- Special Delivery

As much as I love progress and change, I am still old-school about some things.  For example, I still pay most of my bills by writing checks from a checkbook and putting them in the mailbox.  The system has worked for us for 50 years of marriage, and there is something comforting in actually having my hands on an envelope and seeing it disappear into the mail drop.  Usually it works - they haven’t cut off the water or power yet.

But last week, one of the bills I had mailed showed up back in our mailbox with a label - Return to Sender.  I am not sure why the letter was returned.  I used the envelope provided by the agency and made sure their own printed address label was visible in the window.  I didn’t want to send it to the wrong address.  The problem could have been the cute stamp I carefully attached to the upper right-hand corner.  (I admit it does look like the sticker I get from my doctor if I don’t cry when he takes blood.) Whatever the reason, the nice postal employee ripped off the Return label and ran it through again. 

Psychologists and counselors use the term “sending the mail to the wrong address.”  Generally, this refers to directing anger or hurt toward one person when you are really upset with someone else.  We used to call it “kicking-the-dog” syndrome.  You get mad at work and come home and kick the dog (who certainly did not deserve it.) 

Jesus spoke to this very human condition while he was walking the earth.  “If someone wrongs you, go and take up the matter with them when the two of you are alone.  If they listen to you, you have won them over.”  (Matthew 18:15)  We are often tempted to tell our best friend about Person X who hurt our feelings - or to take out our anger on someone else - rather than going to the person who wronged us.  Sending the mail to the wrong address will never get the response we want or need.  Yet, we do it again and again and wonder why our broken relationships stay broken.

Next time you are feeling hurt or angry or sad, examine your heart to see the source of your feelings.  Talk to that person with respect and love.  Make sure you are sending the mail to the right address.

-Dr. Jim Baldwin